"Arctic Freeze"

arctic-freeze-11 So, apparently it never snows here in Portland, or rarely enough so that the arrival of a mere inch or so is enough to paralyze the city and send everyone into a frenzy, complete with full-on news coverage of the so-called "Arctic Freeze" and public health advisories telling us all to be sure and "dress warmly." Like the snide & superior New-Englander I am, I sniffed at it as a tempest in a teapot, and watched the news incredulously, like, are you people serious? Public hysteria over what looked to my eyes like nothing so much as a dusting of confectioners sugar over a holiday cookie? Well, it turns out, when a city doesn't have the budget to maintain a proper fleet of plows and salt/sand trucks for the occasional snowstorm, an inch or so of icy snow really does paralyze things. Everything was shut down yesterday, the roads were a fucking mess (apparently they haven't heard of SALT out here - come to Boston sometime and we'll show you how it's done) with accidents all over the place, and I think they even called off school today. Whatever. Here's my problem. It's also gotten really, unusually cold here - in the 20's, and apparently it's supposed to continue all week. And. My studio. Is. Unheated.

Yes. As a New Englander, I found it a dubious proposition when I rented the place, but it never seemed to go below 40 degrees, and with various space heaters & layered clothing, I was basically okay last year. But. Now! It's not okay!! My studio has a 15 foot ceiling and an entire wall of utterly uninsulated windows, and it is absolutely frigid in there. I tried to work yesterday and despite the space heaters and all kinds of sweaters, it was impossible. My hands were like ice, and the gelid paint was reluctant to leave the tube. I don't know what I'm going to do today. I'm bringing yet another space heater, but honestly, they almost don't stand a chance in that cavernous space. It is so incredibly frustrating to want, need, try to work, and be thwarted by environmental conditions. And this in a space I'm paying $545 a month for!  (That crunching sound you hear is my frozen teeth gnashing together.)

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